BrOwNiE LoR

2012 is coming to the end in 2 days more, many people believe that world will be end when 22 December 2012. But I am not, if now let me choose again, I will wish the world really end when that day.

This year to me is not a nice ending. I face lots of unexpected thing, and realize lots of things that I didn't know. I am 22 this year, next year will be 23. Is already an adult. I should really start behave, think, act like an adult no matter I willingly or not.

1 day, the burden of take care my family will be on me. 1 day, I will have to face all the problems. 1 day, everything that I thought was important will gone. 1 day, love / relationship will be the one not important at all.

Parents, family always the most important thing to me. I can sacrifice myself just to protect my family. But this round I failed. I didn't manage to help them to get rib the pain. Midnight get a called that can scare you to the death is always the story line in TV series. But when it happen in my life, I'm stun. I don't even know how to handle when that moment.

The past few days, I am handling part of the work from my parents. When that moment, I just realize the experience I had before was so few so unreliable. The world is too big to explore. There are still many people, things, to wait for us to explore.  Self confidence will only kill us.

Maybe someone who read this post will think that :"huh? now u just realize o? wth? so slow" But I just want to say, ya. I just realize this and accept this. I am lucky girl that life under a big and strong tree that able to protect me so much. But now, the world change, is time for me to protect the tree. And I'm well ready to do so. If you really think I'm slow. Pls think if what happen on me now happen on you. What will you do?

This is not about blaming or insulting or criticizing but is just telling. I am not longer me.